Supporting your child with school-related stress and anxiety

Last updated: January 24, 2025

It is not uncommon for children to worry about school. School-related anxiety is different from worrying, it is an excessive fear of school and school activities, such as making friends, completing assignments/tests, or answering questions in class. For some children, the most significant source of anxiety can be school itself. Learn more about supporting and navigating your child’s stress and anxiety related to school.

Children can become school-avoidant for many reasons other than school itself. Worries about fitting in and being accepted by peers can affect attendance for some. Others may experience discrimination or bullying at school, making it feel unsafe. These situations require an active response. If your child has faced racism, homophobia, or other forms of discrimination or bullying, contact your school principal to address the situation immediately. 

What is school-related anxiety?

School-related anxiety affects students of all ages. It’s an excessive fear of school and school activities, such as making friends, completing assignments and tests, or answering questions in class. As a parent/caregiver, you are often the primary support person helping your child overcome school-related anxiety.

How do I know if my child is experiencing school-related anxiety? 

If your child shows several of the signs below, they may be dealing with school-related anxiety. 

• increased number of school absences 
• decreased connection with peers at school 
• decreased academic achievement 
• lack of interest in school  
• worries about going to school 
• Acting out/refusal/ crying/ tantrums in younger children when it is time for school 
• physical symptoms of anxiety – headaches, stomach aches, other aches and pains 
• low mood related to going to school 

What can I do to help my child manage school-related anxiety and stress? 

There are many ways you can support your child with stress and anxiety:   

• Keep a predictable routine around school. Knowing what to expect helps your child feel safe and lowers stress levels.  
• Practice being calm together. Relaxation strategies can help decrease feelings of pressure, discomfort and worry.  
• Help your child challenge anxious thoughts and replace them with more balanced ones. 
• Support your child in taking small steps toward attending school. 
• Motivate your child to keep trying. Praise their brave efforts, remind them of previous accomplishments, and support them in facing new challenges. 

When should I reach out for additional help? 

If you don’t see an improvement in your child after trying various strategies, and if school avoidance continues to be a problem, consider seeking outside help.  Speak to your child’s classroom teacher or another school staff member with whom you feel comfortable.  

Available supports include the following: 

• Teaching staff can modify your child’s schedule and/or academic expectations. They can also help prepare for a transition back to school. Request a meeting with the school team to discuss the best ways to support your child. 
• Student support staff can provide coping strategies in school to help your child manage.  
• School mental health professionals can help your child create a graduated entry plan that includes skill-building to support their attendance. 
• For more serious concerns requiring long-term treatment, school mental health professionals can help with referrals to child mental health services.  

Note: Please see the PDF version for further descriptions and information

Helpful resources

• Bullying – For Parents and Caregivers (PREVNet)
• Bullying – We Can All Help Stop It (Ontario)
• School Avoidance (CMHO)